Healing

Now I am trying to heal; from many things. I think that being hit by a car forced me to slow down, when I was hitting hard at the gym and focusing on so many other things while moving forward to a more healthy way of life. I was unable to go to the gym for a month and a half and could barely walk 2 miles without pain.

For anyone that knows me, you know that I don't sit still well and that I have a hard time listening when people tell me that I can't do something, thanks to this and many other quirks, I am incredibly competitive by nature. So having my doctors tell me that i needed time off was not welcome. I didn't want time off of work and I certainly didn't want to take time off of going to the gym...

Unfortunately, I was still peeing blood, and there was no way around that. My organs needed to start healing and the doctors said I had to quit moving. I was put on medical leave at work and was strictly ordered to not go to the gym,

When someone takes away your life, for lack of better words, life as you know it gets flipped, 180 degrees before you know it. Suddenly, I was stuck at home, with little that I could do without prolonging healing, according to the health professionals. Everything that was such a wonderful distraction was suddenly not allowed. I got a lot of rest, and a lot of reading done over that time, and time to process the other occurrences of my summer without running or activity involved...and the house was clean and dinner was made almost every night (I didn't transition well from super active to sedentary).
My mom was an amazing and colorful woman, she supported my overzealous gym-lifestyle and appreciated that I was working so hard to get and stay healthy. She loved that I looked outside of medicines and pills when I was sick and that I worked so hard to be natural and heal naturally from nearly everything. Now, with her gone; I feel I owe my health to myself; I deserve it. I want to get married and have kids and I hope that my love of fitness helps instill the importance of being healthy into them. I try to think positive when I think about the loss of my mom, which can be nearly impossible on somedays, BUT I know she would want me to move forward and keep smiling and that gives me strength on even the toughest days. I know she'll be guiding me for the rest of my days, through my wedding and raising children and all the other obstacles that I have yet to conquer.
This last week was my first full week back at work. By Wednesday I was exhausted, and by the end of physical therapy for my hips I could barely move. Thursday was awful. I had to take Advil all day long just to handle the pain and not let it settle in and take over. Thankfully Friday was much better. Today I went to the gym with the sole intention of sitting in the sauna to loosen up and then stretching followed with a long hot shower at the gym. I am proud to say that I stuck to my plan. I have a race tomorrow, my goal is to run for a max of 5 minutes but at least for 1, and see how I feel...My long term goals include another 5k in November, at a more normal pace for me...Then a half marathon before April. I'm still thinking of the Pikes Peak Ascent, and it still has me intrigued - as does the Yellowstone half. So I'm hoping to get healthy and get back on the race bandwagon as soon as possible.